What we choose to see…
After our oncologist delivered the perplexing news… (not only had Typist’s neutrophil count barely budged, now her platelets were also below an acceptable level to administer more chemo) we waited for a nurse to come remove the port needle. We all hoped for Amy… and Amy it was.
“You’re back! How was it?” Calliope asked.
The last time we saw Amy, she was feeling nervous about a flight she’d be taking that same evening. A trip to Thailand was a gift to her mother who has pancreatic cancer. Mom has had a life long dream to visit the Far East.
“Did you ride an elephant?” Thalia asked, wiggling inside of Typist.
“No… Mom wanted to go to a park that did not have them toting people around. We did put mud on elephants… and then we washed it off.”
Amy told us about her hotel, heat and humidity, sweat soaked masks, and jet lag. Then she said, “I did take your book along and made it to the chapter that starts with M. I was so tired when we had a chance to rest I couldn’t read much.”
Three muses and one Typist beamed and/or blushed.
“I really like that the stories are so relatable to my own life.”
More beaming and blushing…
“I’ll bring you copies of the other two books next week,” said Typist.
And with that, the sting of the morning’s news was softened.
A word from Typist:
I can’t say exactly why, but this inability to receive chemo feels like a punch in the stomach. I suspect it’s because we had a plan to hit the cancer hard and fast and now my body isn’t cooperating. I understand and trust that the doctor is taking a big picture/whole body view. I’ve little doubt this will all work itself out in the long run. It’s just that being thrust back into the unknown again feels unsettling. My challenge continues to be focusing on the light instead of the dark.
In that vein, I received the beautiful encouragement below from my friend Chinchi.
I was sitting here thinking and praying about your 2 delayed treatments on this Holy Thursday… I always want answers to “why” … why wasn’t my prayer for your treatment answered… but then God pointed out to me what an amazing inspirational gift you are who has the strength to write, illustrate, and share your journey with all of us in spite of whatever kind of day you’re experiencing — that makes me appreciate more than ever the gift of today. That’s the answer to my question and I said a prayer of thanks 🙏❤️
I replied:
Reading this gave me Godbumps and inspired my heart and faith to grow. I am loved and I am blessed. Can’t ask for more than that. 🥰 Thank you.
Sometimes when we are in the dark, a friend with a flashlight can make all the difference.
Great article! Thank you for sharing. In Wonderworks by Angus Fletcher I’m reading about literary devices that aid our minds in navigating liminal spaces. (Fletcher doesn’t use that language.) The author says, “The greatest wisdom sees both sides.” I love that!
He also says that literature can fix hearts and lift souls.
There is something called the literary paradox: ice hotter than fire, feathers falling faster than rocks, night outshining the day. “Paradoxes compelling enough to crack open our mind to a simultaneous opposite truth.”
Oh! Thank you for bringing liminal spaces to our thread!
Oh, and I love your elephant!!